Father and son
(A scene from a South Asian Western)
by, Naseer Ahmed
Joe: Pa, I wonder why did you not kill that son of a bitch?I know you are far better gunshot than him. He kept insulting you.Still you did not shoot him?
Big Bull: Ah, Joey everything happens for a purpose.
Joe: And what purpose is in putting up with crap by that yellow belly?
Big Bull: I wanted to show every son of a bitch that I could put up with all kind of humiliation without worrying about human dignity. You know that is a road to job.
Joe: That is mighty smart of you pa.Would you get what you want?
Big Bull: Well, Joey, I think a sign of discomfort appeared in my eyes while I was suffering abuse. Oh, my eyes betrayed me but no worries son, they know I am trying to train myself into being a nobody.It would work in future.
Joe: I hope so Pa. Could I ask you that whether you ever loved ma?
Big Bull: I Did and I still do. She was all sunshine and sugar those days. Still, there was a kind of pride in her which nobody could break. Oh Joey, when I married her, she lost her sunshine and she got bitter and she lost her pride. I loved the way she turned into nothing and I love her to the bits because she is nothing.
Joe: So it is all about nothing Pa. How do they turn something into nothing?
Big Bull:It is easy Joe. The best way is to convince them that they need your instructions and they must follow you whatever you say. They should never think for themselves. They will get whatever out there is worth having if they surrender themselves completely.
Joe: And if they don’t surrender completely.
Big Bull: You set up a system where they are hurt at every step in their life. Everything they view as beautiful is presented to them as ugly. Everything they view as brave is presented to them as treachery. Everything they view as precious is presented to them as worthless. Everything they love is presented to them as hateful. There are conspiracies of discrimination against them. There are attempt at isolating them from what they love and like. They are picked upon every moment. Life becomes kind of hell for them and they surrender completely.
Joe: If they still don’t surrender?
Big Bull: Then, they are traitors to the group. And the group must get rid of them. Mostly such people are fine folks and it is easy to get rid of fine folks. Well, they are not going to do what we do. Besides, usually, they love and cherish. They have another fault that they have some commitment to some high moral principles. Haha, all of what they think are their qualities work against them. An ordinary operator of nothingness could throw them out. They believe love is not about hurt and harm and if they love somebody, you just have to highlight the possibility of hurt and harm to somebody they love and they run away or fall in your feet. They have this image problem attached to their high principles. You throw a bit of mud on the image they have created for themselves, they would run like rabbits. Even if they stay and try to defend themselves, it does not work for them. In the end, it is the gang that wins not a wayward individual with high flown ideals. That is how it is. That is how it has been. That is how it would be.
Joe: Poor fools with high flown ideals. Pa, am I nothing?
Big Bull: well, Joe, you are not at the moment. Young lads and young lasses are usually are not but being nothing is the only trainings and the doors to trainings towards development of individuality, citizen potential and fulfilment are closed. The paths to democracy and dignity could easily align to infidelity. Sooner or later, just before growing up most of young people also surrender completely. And the ones who don’t could serve as bad apples.
Joe: Shall I live in this world as nothing who surrenders completely?
Big Bull: Oh Joe, you don’t know. It is never about what you want to do. You gotta do what you gotta do.Never be a fool with high flown ideals.